Boys are Easy
by Kenners
Summary: It's a boys' night in. Sasuke, Naruto and the others are drinking and talking about normal guy stuff, porm, booze and the Godfather? Then Sakura shows up and lets the boys in on a mischevious little bit of information that leaves their jaws dropping.


It was laughter all around the table and hysterical banging of bottles on the low wooden table. Several of the eight men were bent over clasping their stomachs in agony; the others were trying to hold back tears.

"Jesus so what happened next?" Kiba asked as he tried to sit up straight once again.

"Wait let me catch me breath," the boisterous blonde man said as he picked himself off of the floor. Luckily they had been sitting on the floor of Sasuke's new apartment sat around an accumulation of many beer bottles. There was a quiet hum of soft rock music blending into the background.

"Naruto-kun does tell the best stories," Lee piped in as he gulped down his non-alcoholic beer.

"Trust me these hilarious screw-ups are not intentional," Sasuke said from his slouched position and readjusted his pillow. Through the chorus of laughter he added in "I'm serious, I was there to witness them." Chouji was rolling on the floor with laughter,

"It's funny cos it's true," he managed through his giggles.

"Anyone want another beer?" Neji asked as he got up slowly. There was a resounding yes as he walked off into the kitchen,

Sasuke laughed softly as he leant back against the wall, he looked over the room and the state they had reduced it to and couldn't help but laugh again. Kiba and Chouji were chomping on some potato chips and laughing raucously, Lee and Naruto were undertaking an arm wrestle and making the table shake whilst Shikamaru and Shino were mirroring his position against the wall with their eyes almost shut.

"You alright Shikamaru?" Chouji said with a mouthful of chips.

"I'm fine but I think Shino is out for the count," he said as pushed him over with the tip of a single finger, the covered lad crashed to the floor in an unconscious heap. All the boys let out another howl of merry laughter as Neji walked back into the room.

"What I miss?" he asked. They all burst out laughing again and he just shrugged and sat back down. A crazy riff busted across the speakers and caused all their ears to prick up as if they were a group of dogs.

"RUN DMC! Classic! Turn it up!" Lee jumped up enthusiastically and turned it up crazily loud before jumping around. The lads laughed once more at his drunken behaviour even though he was probably the most sober, which only made them laugh harder.

"Right I have a question for you all," Kiba said with the slightest slur in his voice as Lee's distraction seemed to wane. "Who is the hottest in this group?" he said lifting up a CD off the rack.

"The Pandora's?" Neji said sceptically.

"Sasuke why do you have this in your library?" Chouji asked taking the CD from Neji.

"I'm a punk man at heart," he said.

"Yeah you emo," Shikamaru said offhandedly. Everyone burst into laughter once again.

"You gotta stop doing that, my stomach feels likes it's gonna burst," Chouji said wiping away tears.

"Ya'll still haven't answered my question," Kiba said. He looked down at the cover and squinted a bit. "The one with milky skin and black hair, most definitely." He threw it over to Shikamaru and Chouji who looked it over.

"The blonde," Shikamaru said.

"Definitely," Chouji agreed. He passed it over to Neji who starred at it with indecision. Suddenly the table vibrated and beeping, Neji reached forward and picked up his phone.

"Sorry guys, text off Tenten," he said as he looked down at him phone.

"God it's like she sensed you were looking at another woman," Kiba joked. The guys laughed along with him and made several whipping motions.

"It's not like that you idiots."

"Then what's it like?" Naruto popped in curiously.

"None of your business," he said snappishly.

"Whoa careful it bites," Sasuke kidded.

Suddenly they heard the door close loudly and a voice sounding from further into the apartment,

"Sasuke, came over to pick up the DVD you borrowed, I hope you finished it you…" the cheery voice said followed by her entrance. Sakura walked quickly into the living room looking down at a CD in her hands. She looked up quickly and saw all the guys scattered around the living room. "Oh hi guys," she said with a slightly surprised tone.

"Sakura-chan," Naruto and Lee cried in unison. A number of enthusiastic welcomes reached her at the door way and she walked in.

"Boy's time I see," she said with a smile. She walked on forwards and stepped over the unconscious form that was Shino and looked over her shoulder at him. "Had fun I see." They all laughed along with her as she leant against the wall.

"Don't worry I won't interrupt just gotta collect the DVD I leant Sasuke," she said.

"That's alright Sakura you know you're always welcome at the lads nights," Kiba said with a cocky smile. Sakura cocked an eyebrow.

"Thanks Kiba." She walked over and stood over Sasuke with a questioning look; he turned his head up and starred up at her for a small moment wondering why she was just standing there.

"Well… are you going to get my movie or not?!" she said. He shook his head,

"Oh yeah," he said as he shook his head. Kiba and Neji exchanged a small look.

He walked over to the VCR and pressed several buttons in frustration before cursing.

"Don't tell me you've lost it? It's a classic," she moaned quietly.

"What is it?" Shikamaru asked.

"The Godfather 2," she said with a grin. They all hummed along in agreement and she laughed in a low tone. She liked hanging with the guys, they were easy company. Her mother didn't approve though and the girls commented now and again on her becoming a bit of a lad. But she didn't really care, they were good company.

"Shit I can't find it, look on the kitchen counter Haruno," he said as she looked behind his television. She sighed and walked over grumbling under her breath as she was forced to search his entire home for her belongings.

"How can I help look?" Naruto asked as he bounced up in the idea of helping Sakura.

"Just check the bookshelves would you," Sasuke said in a muffled voice from beneath the pillows of one of his couches. Naruto looked up and down the shelves and pulled several books out throwing them behind him in desperation.

"Oi!" Sasuke yelled at him. Naruto just batted his hand at him and didn't look at him as he kept perusing the collection.

"Whoa whoa! Why the hell do you have an Icha Icha Paradise book here?!" Naruto yelled in shock pointing at the small orange book in his hand he had removed from the book case.

"Oh that," Sasuke said as he sat back down at the table, evidently fed up with his search. "Kakashi leant it to me."

"And you read it. It's perverted," Naruto cried.

"No it's not," Sasuke said dismissively.

"He's actually right Naruto-kun. It helps keep your springtime of youth forever blooming. That's what Gai-sensei says any way," Lee said.

"Lee you can't be serious!" Naruto said horrified.

"I don't know about the umm "Springtime of Youth" thing but he's right. It is a good read," Chouji said with a cheery smile.

"You too Chouji?!" Naruto cried once more. All the other guys mumbled in agreement and nodded at each other acknowledging the qualities that made it such a good read. Naruto starred upon them dumbfounded and then stormed across the room determinedly.

"Neji, I can count of level headed Neji," he said as he reached the Hyuuga and threw his hand down on his shoulder. "I can bet that Neji doesn't read the trashy porno," Naruto declared as he rummaged through Neji's bag like a ferret.

"Wha? Naruto Stop!" Neji yelled, obviously annoyed. Naruto scavenged for a little while longer until he came across something finally.

"Aha now see," he said as he pulled out a hard back book and displayed it for all the others to see.

"Shut up Naruto. We don't want Sakura hearing us talk about it, she'll just tell the other girls and it will land Shikamaru and Neji in the shit!" Sasuke said in a hushed voice trying to suppress his anger and frustration.

"Well Neji won't land in the shit cos the book is normal, not porn!" Naruto said as he pointed at the book, completely ignorant of Sasuke's advice. "Take that Sasuke you perverted freak! Anyway you just don't want Sakura-chan to hear you cos you'll get all embarrassed," he said with a wily look in his eye as he paraded the book's cover. Everyone gave him a very strange look and Kiba let out a small cough,

"Uhhh Naruto you might want to look at the front cover," he said as he scratched his head. Naruto looked at him confused and then turned the book around to examine it. There was the painfully obvious Dark blue cover and large red cross on the front that gave away Neji's little porn penchant. Naruto turned the brightest shade of red and thrust the book back into Neji's bag,

"Naruto you little idiot, never burrow through my things," Neji said as he punched him in the stomach. Naruto was thrown back a little and Neji shook his hand slightly. "What the hell is in your pocket?" Neji shot at him. Naruto gave a small chuckle and with a devilish smile pulled out a small pink book with the crass illustrations of Jiraiya.

"Icha Icha Wild Nights, newest release," he said with a wicked smile. Shikamaru sighed,

"Why did you make such a big deal about it then, you knew you read it as much as all the rest of us," he said with the word troublesome thrown in many times. Naruto leant in to them with his hand covering the side of his mouth.

"I know I just didn't want Sakura –chan to think so," Naruto said in a kind of whisper.

"Ah Clever Naruto-kun," Lee said as he gave him a slap on the back.

"Newest edition?" Kiba questioned.

"Yeah have a peak," Naruto said as he threw it overhead. Kiba gave the blurb a look over and flicked through the pages quickly before throwing it at Chouji.

"Doesn't look half as good as Icha Icha Pursue," he said casually.

"Are you kidding that was the worst yet," Chouji said. "The best was Icha Icha Hunger."

"About food fetishes?" Neji said in a very sceptical tone.

"You forget who you're talking to Hyuuga. Anyway Icha Icha Paradise was the best. The first one," Shikamaru said.

"Hnnn I agree," Neji mumbled.

"You're all crazy, Icha Icha Violence was best by far," Sasuke said offhandedly. "Anyway it doesn't really matter which is the best as it's never put into practice. The women in our age group are just too conventional." Mumbles of agreement sounded around the room with the odd "Don't I know it," and a "What I wouldn't give" for added effect. Sasuke peered through the new pink volume and flicked a bit.

"Hey Sasuke is there any reason my DVD cover has tomatoes all over it?" Sakura said as she walked back into the room, rubbing what appeared to be tomato juice off of her black t-shirt and jeans. Sasuke looked up from the book to her with a small look of horror on his face as she peered at him sat with the small porn bible in his lap. She looked around the boys and they all had the same look of embarrassed terror on their faces, she smiled and walked on into the room trying to maintain the tense atmosphere as long as possible. She walked to the other side of the room and peered over Sasuke's shoulder at the book.

"Hmmm well whilst I have to admit the illustrations are brilliantly graphic I think I prefer the positions in Icha Icha Espionage. Far more challenging positions" she said as she stood back up. "I guess I'll be off now then guys," she said as she walked round the table towards the door. She gave Naruto a small poke and toppled him over easily. She walked towards the door and could feel all their eyes on her back, she chuckled to herself as she walked away but before she left for good she turned around and shifted back over towards Sasuke, bent down and slid the book out of his hands. She could feel the heat of his beetroot blush radiate off of him, it almost made her laugh.

"Mind if I borrow this. Been bored a bit lately, maybe this will help spice things up," she said in a sultry voice as she got up for the final time. She turned around again with a smile and pointed to the spot just under her nose.

"You've all got a little something red right there," she said with a small giggle before turned around and leaving the house. She shut the door and laughed to herself,

"_Boys are so easy." _


End file.
